You’re the quarterback. Your bride-to-be is the coach. She’s calling the plays, and you’re making them. You have to pick the best team that you can so that you make sure to not drop the ball and score the touchdown during your wedding. Here’s a man’s description of the important positions so that you can make your choice:
The Best Man - Running Back
He’s got your back... literally. The Best Man is your closest brother and/or friend. He’s got to be able to block the blitz (from the others in the bridal party, but never the bride.. he’s on his own there..), take the ball and run with it (if the groom can’t get something done, the best man needs to pick up the slack), or run out a short route and catch the touchdown pass (finish anything up during the last minute preparations to ensure wedding victory). He should be able to do a good touchdown dance, otherwise your bachelor’s party will be lame. Make sure he’s reliable, or you could end up fumbling the ball, or worse.. throwing an interception.
Groomsmen - Wide Receivers
These guys are the big play makers. Usually, you’ll have two to four on the field ready to catch everything you throw at them. Make sure they’re dependable. If you can’t rely on them to catch the ball, bench ‘em. They should be pretty close to you and be able to read your audibles. Good picks for your starters are brothers, cousins, good friends, or your bride-to-be’s brothers or cousins.
Ushers - The Offensive Line
You’re going to need some blockers on the front line. The ushers serve as your front blockers. They should be clean, well built, suit up well, and strong enough to escort those elderly women down the aisle. They need to be able to set up the block so that you’re protected. They need to be teachable, since they’ll need to know the playbook (the wedding timeline). They’ll need to communicate with the receivers (Groomsmen) and running back (the Best Man), so that they can block for them too. Your starting offensive line should include four or five of the considerations for groomsmen that you didn’t pick.
Ring Bearer - The Ball Boy
He’s going to provide a little back up on the sidelines, and he’s going to look adorable on the field. He’ll hold the ball (the wedding ring) while you’re in the huddle, and he’ll be ready to pass it off for you to make the big play.
Now that you know what each of your players needs to be able to do, you can draft your perfect team. Ready, BREAK!
