Parents of the Groom Checklist

Your son is getting married! Congratulations! You’ve got some newly found responsibilities laying on your shoulders now. In today’s society, the bride and groom may pick up a majority of the wedding tab, or it might be divided more evenly between the parents of bride and groom. Traditionally, you’ve got a big part of the wedding preparation now. Here’s a summary of your responsibilities.

1. The Guest List

The parents of the bride are going to have a list of the guests that they want to invite to the wedding, but they don’t know your family. You need to create your side of the guest list. Discuss the wedding budget with the parents of the bride before hand, so that you don’t invite too many people. Keep in mind, about half of the invited guests will attend. Make sure that your addresses are up-to-date. Include the name, address, and sometimes an email address. With technology on the rise, it is not uncommon to email Save the Dates to guests.

2. Rehearsal Dinner

Traditionally, the rehearsal dinner is prepared and paid for by the mother and father of the groom. If you love to cook, make a traditional dinner consisting of ham or turkey and all the trimmings. If you’re a grill master, cook hamburgers and hot dogs for the bridal party. If you don’t have the time or resources to devote to it, call a local restaurant and set a reservation to have them cook dinner and clean up afterward. Make sure that you specify whether gratuity is included or not.

3. Attendance at Bridal Showers

It is customary for the mother of the groom to attend all bridal showers. If any of them are couples showers, the father of the groom should attend as well. It is also respectful to bring a gift to each shower that you attend. It is also a respectful gesture to throw a shower if possible.

4. Your Dress and Suit

You should purchase your dress to match the wedding colors or to match the mother of the bride. The father of the groom should also match the wedding party. Make sure to order all apparel a minimum of 6 to 8 weeks, but preferably 4 to 6 months, in advance. This gives the vendors time to alter them and then for you to try them on and make any final alterations prior to the wedding.

5. The Wedding and Reception

The big day is about the bride and groom. Do what you were asked to do during the rehearsal and try to enjoy and remember it. Traditionally, you should stand with the bride and groom in the recession line following the wedding, and then be present for pictures between the ceremony and reception. The father of the groom may be asked to make a speech during the reception and the mother of the groom may be asked to dance in a mother-son dance.