Best Man's Reponsibilities

Being the Best Man at a wedding is a great honor. The groom picked you out of all of his friends and family to be the man standing next to him during the most important day of his life. He also indirectly picked you to carry a large responsibility before, during, and after the wedding so that he can focus on all of the other aspects of the wedding. Here’s a list of your responsibilities:

1. After the wedding ceremony is complete, it is your responsibility to pay the fee of the officiant. The groom should hand you the money for the officiant prior to the wedding. After he does his job correctly, pay him discretely and thank him from the bride and groom.

2. If a ring bearer is carrying the rings, you are responsible for making sure the child doesn’t run off with them or lose them. You’re also supposed to make sure he walks down the aisle and stands where he needs to be. If there is no ring bearer, or the bride and groom elect not to allow him to carry the rings, you are responsible for the bride’s and/or groom’s ring. Hang on to them with your life and pass them off when the officiant asks for them.

3. Consider yourself the head usher. In most situations, the ushers are grouped and need a leader. You will probably escort the grandmothers to their seats, so you need to know who they are. You also need to make sure that you mingle with everyone as they walk in. Inform the ushers that women and men with boutonnieres and corsages have special seating.

3. Arrangements for transportation to and from the honeymoon site are on the shoulders of the Best Man. If they don’t have a limo or other transportation, the get-away car is yours for decoration. Be sensible, and make sure they can safely drive, but go nuts. Tie some cans on the back, write all over it with window chalk, etc. If the new couple have a 6A.M. flight to catch, you need to be dropping them off at the airport or finding them a ride. If they do not have a ride home after their honeymoon, you have to pick them up, too.

4. You may be expected to give a Best Man speech. Get creative with it. Feel free to embarrass the groom, but be tasteful, and be sure to compliment the bride. Make it as long as you want, but make sure you’re not boring the guests, and definitely make sure they are laughing.

5. Return the groom’s tux to the shop after the wedding is over if he rented a tux. You may also be responsible for gathering the other groomsmen, fathers, and ushers tuxedos also. Make sure you ask the rental company when they want the tuxes back ahead of time.

6. The Bachelor's Party is one of the most important parts of the Best Man’s workload. Make sure you plan something that the groom will love, and you’re in charge of organizing everything and paying for it, unless you can make an arrangement with everyone else. It’s a night to be remembered, and should be treated as such. Just don’t lose the groom...

Responsibilities of the Groomsmen and Ushers

The Groomsmen and Ushers are very  valuable parts of the wedding party. They serve as witness to the wedding, assistants of the groom, and aids elsewhere before, during, and after the wedding. Here's a guide to the necessary positions:

1. If ushers are present, they hold the responsibility of seating guests in their appropriate places. If there are no ushers, then the groomsmen are customarily responsible for seating guests. Begin by encouraging them to sign the guestbook as they arrive.

    Seat the guests as follows:
    - Traditionally, friends and family of the bride are seated to the left of the center aisle.

          Likewise, friends and family of the groom should be seated on the right side.

        - During a Jewish wedding, the previous statement is reversed.

        - During a military wedding, seat the soldiers according to rank.

        - When ushering a couple, take the woman’s arm and the man should follow.

        - When ushering a family, take the woman’s arm and the man and/or family should follow.

        - When ushering a two women, take the elder woman’s arm, the younger follows.

        - When ushering two girls, take both girls’ arms.

        - When ushering men, simply accompany them to their seat.

2. If ushers are present during the ceremony, they should hold the door(s) through the procession of the bridal party. If no ushers are present, the bride and groom should make arrangements for the doors.

3. After the ceremony is complete, the groomsmen should escort their bridesmaids down the aisle. Immediately following, the ushers and/or groomsmen should begin escorting the guests out of the venue, beginning with the parents, grandparents, and immediate families of the bride and groom.